|Mörkeralv / Lönnmördare
||23 år (22 oktober)
The mother of all fuck-ups is assumption
Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.
Tänk idiotiskt, agera globalt
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Utdrag från ovanstående lista:
This Evil Overlord List is Copyright 1996-1997 by Peter Anspach.
If I burst into rebel headquarters and find it deserted except for an odd, blinking device, I will not walk up and investigate; I'll run like hell.
My Legions of Terror will be trained in basic marksmanship. Any who cannot learn to hit a man-sized target at 10 meters will be used for target practice.
If I am escaping in a large truck and the hero is pursuing me in a small Italian sports car, I will not wait for the hero to pull up along side of me and try to force him off the road as he attempts to climb aboard. Instead I will slam on the brakes when he's directly behind me. (A rudimentary knowledge of physics can prove quite useful.)
When I've captured my adversary and he says, "Look, before you kill me, will you at least tell me what this is all about?" I'll say, "No." and shoot him. No, on second thought I'll shoot him then say "No."
I will be neither chivalrous nor sporting. If I have an unstoppable superweapon, I will use it as early and as often as possible instead of keeping it in reserve.
If I capture the hero's starship, I will keep it in the landing bay with the ramp down, only a few token guards on duty and a ton of explosives set to go off as soon as it clears the blast-range.
A warlock's life is quite hard
Upon attempting to subvert a Doom Guard
The demon broke free
And grinned wickedly
Before pounding poor Warlock to lard.
Ett flummigt skämt:
Once there was an archery contest. Three men reached the finals where you have to shoot an apple from a guys head with an arrow.
The first participant manages to shoot the apple from the boys head.
When the audience applauses the participant says: "I'm Robin Hood!"
Then the second also manages to shoot the apple from the boys head.
He says: "I'm Wilhelm Tell!"
The the third participant hits the boy in the head and says: "I'm sorry"